May
11
2009
The Virtuous Woman – Proverbs 31
Author: RickIn Proverbs 31 we find the prophecy of a virtuous woman. King Lemuel’s mother taught him what to look for in a woman. In order to make these things memorable, she made an acrostic with the Hebrew alphabet. There is no greater passage in all of the Bible where we find such a description of a godly woman. Let’s consider Her Price, Her Personality, Her Priorities and Her Praise.
1. Her Price
Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
God attaches a high value to a virtuous woman. A virtuous woman is one who possesses moral excellence. She is both pure and chaste. She is moderate in her temperament and modest in her appearance. A virtuous woman has a love for and a fear of God. Her desire to live a life to the praise of Jesus Christ dictates how she behaves in all of her other relationships.
A quick survey of our society proves the rarity of such women. The virtuous woman maintains her purity even in the midst of a world which demeans and denigrates such virtue. She is a precious treasure, and as Proverbs 12:4 says,
Proverbs 12:4. A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband…
2. Her Personality
a. She is Competent
Proverbs 31:16 She considereth (plans, thinks about) a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
The virtuous woman is both competent and capable. Here the woman in Proverbs 31 has the ability to reason through wise business transactions. She perceives that the purchase of this field would be a great benefit to her household. She buys it with her own money (earned from her home business of making sashes), and plants it herself. She is a woman that can be trusted with money. She uses her finances for the benefit of her family and not her own lusts.
b. She is Confident
Proverbs 31:18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
Proverbs 31:21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
Proverbs 31:25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
The virtuous woman possesses a quiet confidence. She strives to succeed in the role that God has given her as a wife and a mother. Her fear of God (v30) ensures that all the praise goes to Him for any success she experiences.
She is not pessimistic about her role as a godly woman. She recognizes Gods blessings on her life and the abilities that He has given her. She does not fear the future but rejoices to see it. She is prepared for the seasons to come and has ensured that her family is as well.
She exudes a quiet confidence. Her excellent character, her competence and her confidence are enveloped by an over arching meekness.
Proverbs 31:26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
She has no need to prove her worth to others. As if to cast her pearls before swine. She has first submitted herself to the Lord and finds her satisfaction in Him, not in the acknowledgement or promotion of the world.
The book of Proverbs provides quite a contrast between the virtuous woman and those who possess no virtue. Consider the quiet confidence of the Proverbs 31 woman in contrast to these women:
Proverbs 21:9 It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
Proverbs 19:13 A foolish son is the calamity of his father: and the contentions of a wife are a continual dropping.
c. She is Compassionate
Proverbs 31:20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
The virtuous woman is a compassionate and a charitable woman. Her charity exists to the exclusion of covetousness. Charity and covetousness cannot dwell in the same heart.
She looks to the needs of others before she satisfies her personal wants.
d. She is Chaste
Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
Proverbs 31:29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
Virtue and chastity are closely linked. The Proverbs 31 woman is a chaste woman. She has learned to convey her beauty and femininity without feeling the need to convey her sexuality. She remains pure in the midst of an impure culture. She is uninfluenced by societies distorted ideals for women. She seeks rather to conform to the Biblical model of a virtuous woman.
1 Timothy 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
The virtuous woman understands that the clothing of a woman and the character of a woman are inextricably linked.
Proverbs 7:10 And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart.11 (She is loud and stubborn; her feet abide not in her house:
Just as a harlot wears attire that reflects her impure and adulterous heart, the virtuous woman seeks to adorn herself with clothing that reflects her pure and chaste heart.
She understands that her dress should compliment her demeanour and not contradict it. Her fear of God and her desire to live a Godly life directly influences her dress. She desires that her appearance clearly reflects the holy character that she strives to possess.
1 Peter 3:1 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel.
4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
The main focus of the virtuous woman is her pure and godly heart. Her chaste behaviour will be the defining characteristic in her life, not her outward appearance.
e. She is Comforting
Proverbs 31:11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
Proverbs 31:12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
The husband of the virtuous woman has a heart that is at rest. He knows that she is not vindictive, she is not selfish, but she seeks only what is good and right. She actively pursues the wellbeing and comfort of her husband and her family. Her home is a haven and a joy to return to.
f. She is Creative
Proverbs 31:16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
Proverbs 31:24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.
If needed, the virtuous woman finds creative ways to provide income for her home. She does not violate her first priority as a wife and mother, but through frugality and creativity finds opportunities to help provide for her home.
g. She is Conscientious
Proverbs 31:15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
Proverbs 31:17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
Proverbs 31:13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
The virtuous woman is a woman of physical strength. She is strong and healthy because she willingly works with her hands. She strengthens herself not for vain purposes, but as the result of a diligent effort to fulfill God’s role for her.
3. Her Priorities
Proverbs 31:27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Proverbs 31:15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
Proverbs 31:21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
Proverbs 31:23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
The virtuous woman seeks the success of her husband. By her diligent fulfillment of her role was wife and mother she enables her husband to excel in his calling. He is a successful man because she has chosen to be a successful wife and mother.
Proverbs 31:28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
Proverbs 31:30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
Her first priority is to please the Lord whom she fears. Next, as an act of worship towards her Saviour, she satisfies the exalted role that He has given her as a wife and mother.
The virtuous woman has a life which focuses on her household. She serves her household as if she is serving Christ. She is not susceptible to this worlds denigration of the stay-at-home mom but rather fulfills her position with a great sense of gravity and importance.
4. Her Praise
Proverbs 31:28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
The virtuous woman finds satisfaction in knowing that she is pleasing her God. God blesses the virtuous woman with a husband and children that praise her. She does not have a drive to find personal satisfaction or fulfillment in the world but rather joys in the product of her work as a godly wife and mother.
Conclusion
Titus 2:3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
The virtuous woman seeks to raise up daughters who are chaste and virtuous. She accepts the influential position as role model and desires to train up another generation of virtuous women.
